Today’s blog is two-fold. It explores a relatively new word, collywobbles, peeks into the ethics of using it, and gives me a chance to talk about stomach queasiness in our profession. It’s not really new, but it’s been hiding under the covers since maybe 1823.[1] It’s overly informal, barely on its way in literature, and suspiciously humorous. It speaks to the intense anxiety comorbid with stomach queasiness. If your stomach acts out like that, stop reading now.
Madame Merriam Webster says it is a friendlier-sounding transformation of cholera morbus, the New Latin term for the disease cholera, that was influenced by the words colic and wobble.[2] A commonly used derivative is quit your bellyaching. Common synonyms for collywobbles include dithers, heart skipping a beat, and heebie-jeebies. Antonyms are aplenty—assurance, confidence, absence of worry, audacity, bliss, calmness, determination, equanimity, freedom from doubt, and imperturbability.[3]
Writers know the word, avoid using it, but often feel it. As in, I can’t write today I feel collywobbles coming on. In fact, word warriors at Washington State University allegedly tried to ban collywobbles as an acceptable word.[4] Even more allegedly, they tried to pull elfock out of acceptable use at the same time.
For writers, both aspiring and aspirated, there is a book on the core subject, pun intended. “A cheeky up-close and personal guide to the secrets and science of our digestive system. For too long, the gut has been the body’s most ignored and least appreciated organ, but it turns out that it’s responsible for more than just dirty work: our gut is at the core of who we are. Gut, an international bestseller, gives the alimentary canal its long-overdue moment in the spotlight. With quirky charm, rising science star Giulia Enders explains the gut’s magic, answering questions like: Why does acid reflux happen? What’s really up with gluten and lactose intolerance? How does the gut affect obesity and mood? Communication between the gut and the brain is one of the fastest-growing areas of medical research—on par with stem-cell research. Our gut reactions, we learn, are intimately connected with our physical and mental well-being. Enders’ beguiling manifesto will make you finally listen to those butterflies in your stomach: they’re trying to tell you something important.”[5]
While this may irk some readers, the topic word—collywobbles—should be explained in context, the stomach. When we write physical descriptions of our characters, we often struggle to find the right words, the right combination, and the right body parts. Every writer knows too much physical description slows the narrative pace. Too little means readers might not form clear mental images. Many a book never makes it over the transom because editors and publishers have trouble connecting with characters or caring about their plight.[6]
That’s where the stomach comes in. Gut descriptions and IBS can add oomph to creating vivid images as readers picture your characters in their minds through your words.
One way to balance the showing and telling of physical description is to showcase a few details that help ‘tell the story’ about who your character is and what they’ve been through up to this point. Think about what makes them different and interesting. Can a unique feature, clothing choice, or way they carry themselves help to hint at their personality? Also, consider how they move their body. Using movement will naturally show a character’s physical features, keep the pace flowing, and help to convey their emotions. Think about these words: flat, tight, pierced, round, thick, jiggly, bloated, puffy, stretch-marked, bloblike, rolly, ballooned, pregnant, hefty, plump, obese, pudgy, portly, skinny. Stomachs will get there because that’s what stomachs do. “They bounce jiggle, vibrate, quiver, tremble, shake, judder, jounce, tighten, harden, tense, suck in, bind, go slack, release, bulge, balloon, billow, relax, and stretch.”[7]
When you write from both your gut and your brain, you can gather an inner self-consciousness by imagining your own body. Do you suck in your stomach to make it appear flat? Do you expose your midriff? The list is endless.
As ethicists are wont to say, what ethical imperatives control or at least influence a writer’s collywobbles? When you write do you have dithers, does your heart skip a beat, do you have the heebie-jeebies? Are you overanxious to the point of pain in your gut? None of these symptoms invoke ethical imbalance. It’s not fraudulent, plagiarism, duplicate publication, or conflict of interest. Take some Tums. If that doesn’t work, try Pepto Bismol Chewables. And remember, collywobbles are not contagious.
[1] https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/collywobbles
[2] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/collywobbles
[3] https://www.powerthesaurus.org/collywobbles/antonyms
[4] https://www.macombdaily.com/2022/01/11/word-warriors-aim-to-pull-elflock-and-collywobbles-from-the-literary-cellars/
[5] https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23013953-gut
[6] https://writershelpingwriters.net/2013/02/physical-attributes-entry-stomach/
[7] Ibid.
I am an author and a part-time lawyer with a focus on ethics and professional discipline. I teach creative writing and ethics to law students at Arizona State University. Read my bio.
If you have an important story you want told, you can commission me to write it for you. Learn how.
I am an author and a part-time lawyer with a focus on ethics and professional discipline. I teach creative writing and ethics to law students at Arizona State University. 
My latest novel is Emergence, the sequel to Let’s Disappear. 
If you have an important story you want told, you can commission me to write it for you. 